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Top Repairmen (Breath)
Character
Items Repaired
1.) a black-footed ferret 3,017
2.) The Collector 2,988
3.) FrederickChristTrump 2,011
4.) Tamamo 1,850
5.) Emmett Brown 1,711
6.) Deathpoint 1,490
7.) Genya Valerian 1,468
8.) An Animated Factory 1,466
9.) Aaida 1,411
10.) a Clown 1,396
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Top Readers (Breath)
Character
Books Read
1.) Slimer 2,525
2.) Molovian 2,294
3.) Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler 2,287
4.) Samantha Baron 2,187
5.) a red-billed cuckoo 2,136
6.) Abdul Alhazred 2,128
7.) Theta 1,965
8.) Elisabeth Kirchner 1,955
9.) Ranath Myket 1,860
10.) Cerce 1,795
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Most Killed Characters (Breath)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Elska Skapraun 4,724
2.) a bag of XP 2,576
3.) An True 1,788
4.) Grigori Rasputin 1,659
5.) Devlin Bower 1,217
6.) Ricky Spanish 1,128
7.) Aaaargh 1,093
8.) a young Adolf Hitler 1,056
9.) The Central Scrutinizer 1,056
10.) IvanaTrump 1,054
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Top Door Repairmen (Career)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Gromit 1,858
2.) Guttersnipe 1,753
3.) Doorman! 1,694
4.) Black Saphire 1,511
5.) Tyrannicus 1,395
6.) Meatbag the Mime 1,388
7.) Amok 1,368
8.) Jabril 1,348
9.) The Majestic Deadmeat 1,338
10.) Tsutomu 1,320
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Top Healers (Career)
Character
HP Healed
1.) A friendly sorcerer 144,135
2.) R5-D4 77,438
3.) Special Agent: Kitty-Bat-Kat 74,210
4.) Big Boy Bob 69,696
5.) Janni 65,556
6.) Serena Hasheen 58,029
7.) Sofia Piscitelli 55,593
8.) Manco 52,971
9.) Doc Heywood 49,179
10.) MzKoRE 48,987
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Top Repairmen (Career)
Character
Items Repaired
1.) a black-footed ferret 8,712
2.) The Collector 4,598
3.) Father Christmas 2,789
4.) a tiny grasshopper 2,753
5.) An Animated Factory 2,685
6.) Jabril 2,586
7.) buzz deathwish 2,574
8.) GreatCatatonic 2,555
9.) Atka 2,184
10.) Mosqu 2,093
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Top Alcoholics (Breath)
Character
Booze Consumed
1.) Patchy the Pirate 4,668
2.) Rick C-137 1,523
3.) Rust Belt Bill 1,196
4.) FrederickChristTrump 1,127
5.) Tom Green 1,108
6.) A Little Baby Dragon 1,098
7.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,087
8.) an inconspicuous bystander 1,084
9.) MelaniaTrump 1,066
10.) Mosquito 1,064
Posted: Sun Feb 02, 2020 6:40 am Post subject: Complete and Current Composition of Newspaper Updates, Enjoy
Quote:
Top Alcoholics (Breath)
Character
Booze Consumed
1.) Patchy the Pirate 4,678
2.) Rick C-137 1,523
3.) Rust Belt Bill 1,198
4.) FrederickChristTrump 1,127
5.) Tom Green 1,108
6.) A Little Baby Dragon 1,098
7.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,087
8.) an inconspicuous bystander 1,084
9.) MelaniaTrump 1,066
10.) Mosquito 1,064
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Top Alcoholics (Career)
Character
Booze Consumed
1.) Patchy the Pirate 4,678
2.) Grugg 4,497
3.) tastyintestines 2,928
4.) Yaz Shamriz 2,052
5.) Vile Brimstone 2,042
6.) Rust Belt Bill 1,719
7.) Overseer 1,681
8.) Sac II 1,673
9.) Gromit 1,642
10.) Rick C-137 1,523
Top Punching Bags (Breath)
Character
Damage Taken
1.) a bag of XP 374,604
2.) Elska Skapraun 274,149
3.) Franknfurter 253,265
4.) An True 232,497
5.) Nathan Grantham 216,476
6.) BarronTrump 180,827
7.) I was once a plant! 159,110
8.) Sara 136,838
9.) Expired Condiments 124,368
10.) Gnarknorb 123,684
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Top Punching Bags (Career)
Character
Damage Taken
1.) Kenny McCormick 701,977
2.) a bag of XP 477,252
3.) Nathan Grantham 419,008
4.) An True 355,456
5.) Elska Skapraun 287,034
6.) Franknfurter 283,073
7.) Champion Sounds 256,238
8.) Grunk the Pale 236,426
9.) A Majestic Ghast 192,088
10.) Bob Probert 190,774
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Most Killed Characters (Breath)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Elska Skapraun 4,725
2.) a bag of XP 2,590
3.) An True 1,791
4.) Grigori Rasputin 1,659
5.) Devlin Bower 1,218
6.) Ricky Spanish 1,128
7.) Aaaargh 1,093
8.) The Central Scrutinizer 1,057
9.) a young Adolf Hitler 1,056
10.) IvanaTrump 1,054
Quote:
Most Killed Characters (Career)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Kenny McCormick 10,710
2.) Elska Skapraun 4,888
3.) a bag of XP 3,491
4.) Devlin Bower 2,619
5.) Bob Probert 2,337
6.) An True 2,322
7.) the Gulf Oil Spill 2,165
8.) Bugabear 2,057
9.) tastyintestines 1,916
10.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,787
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Top Demon Killers (Breath)
Character
Demons Killed
1.) Pharaoh 945
2.) Catvom 755
3.) Sartan 567
4.) Kira 514
5.) Baalberith 496
6.) Malhavok 491
7.) Immanent_Eschaton 419
8.) Skull Face 358
9.) Big Boy Bob 348
10.) Simo Häyhä 344
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Top Demon Killers (Career)
Character
Demons Killed
1.) Baalberith 1,165
2.) Bob Ross 1,155
3.) Skull Face 1,144
4.) Pharaoh 1,034
5.) Catvom 1,001
6.) Eliise 890
7.) Kiano 888
8.) Two-Socks 862
9.) A shadow 708
10.) Helen Keller 674
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Top Door Destroyers (Breath)
Character
Doors Destroyed
1.) Devlin Bower 1,430
2.) Liemannen 1,353
3.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,154
4.) :Ghost: 1,131
5.) MelaniaTrump 1,088
6.) Armaros 1,079
7.) Pascal 1,066
8.) Huntress 1,056
9.) The Central Scrutinizer 1,055
10.) Mettaton 1,054
Quote:
Top Door Destroyers (Career)
Character
Doors Destroyed
1.) Yarish 1,989
2.) Killer Bean 1,722
3.) Liemannen 1,624
4.) Black Saphire 1,596
5.) Devlin Bower 1,497
6.) Tyrannicus 1,481
7.) Mr Dalliard 1,235
8.) Baalhrezem 1,211
9.) Good Guy Badziew 1,211
10.) Drell 1,195
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Top Door Repairmen (Breath)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Amok 1,344
2.) :Ghost: 1,170
3.) EricTrump 1,166
4.) Emma Burke 1,109
5.) FrederickChristTrump 1,066
6.) Mettaton 1,052
7.) IvankaTrump 1,048
8.) PresidentDonaldTrump 1,047
9.) Preacher 1,045
10.) Terraplane 1,043
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Top Door Repairmen (Career)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Gromit 1,858
2.) Guttersnipe 1,753
3.) Doorman! 1,694
4.) Black Saphire 1,511
5.) Tyrannicus 1,395
6.) Meatbag the Mime 1,388
7.) Amok 1,368
8.) Jabril 1,348
9.) The Majestic Deadmeat 1,338
10.) Tsutomu 1,320
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Top Gourmands (Breath)
Character
Food Eaten
1.) Franknfurter 2,415
2.) Patchy the Pirate 1,676
3.) Black Saphire 1,614
4.) Carilgar 1,180
5.) Flowey 1,175
6.) Seldara 1,170
7.) A Little Baby Dragon 1,147
8.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,139
9.) Koldar 1,131
10.) AmIaGhost 1,126
Quote:
Top Gourmands (Career)
Character
Food Eaten
1.) Franknfurter 2,426
2.) Gromit 2,096
3.) Patchy the Pirate 1,676
4.) Black Saphire 1,673
5.) The King In Yellow 1,570
6.) Seldara 1,498
7.) Carilgar 1,487
8.) Chompy 1,471
9.) Bleu Saphire 1,424
10.) Nightfire 1,422
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Top Healers (Breath)
Character
HP Healed
1.) Special Agent: Kitty-Bat-Kat 73,518
2.) R5-D4 60,564
3.) Sofia Piscitelli 57,380
4.) Serena Hasheen 56,819
5.) Manco 54,483
6.) Doc Heywood 49,315
7.) Zywie 42,149
8.) Dr Teeth 40,425
9.) Big Boy Bob 37,843
10.) no one 30,526
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Top Healers (Career)
Character
HP Healed
1.) A friendly sorcerer 144,135
2.) R5-D4 78,331
3.) Special Agent: Kitty-Bat-Kat 74,210
4.) Big Boy Bob 69,696
5.) Janni 65,556
6.) Serena Hasheen 58,145
7.) Sofia Piscitelli 57,380
8.) Manco 54,512
9.) Doc Heywood 49,315
10.) MzKoRE 48,987
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Top Crafters (Breath)
Character
Items Crafted
1.) a random janitor 2,813
2.) Aaida 2,486
3.) Emmett Brown 2,441
4.) Sara 2,376
5.) Tamamo 2,170
6.) Vriska Serket 1,847
7.) Notorious RBG 1,824
8.) Martha Stewart 1,741
9.) Deathpoint 1,538
10.) Explosivo 1,530
Quote:
Top Crafters (Career)
Character
Items Crafted
1.) Sara 2,889
2.) a random janitor 2,813
3.) Aaida 2,486
4.) Emmett Brown 2,472
5.) Tamamo 2,170
6.) Andrew 2,055
7.) Vriska Serket 1,847
8.) Notorious RBG 1,824
9.) Martha Stewart 1,741
10.) Gromit 1,671
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Top Repairmen (Breath)
Character
Items Repaired
1.) a black-footed ferret 3,017
2.) The Collector 2,988
3.) FrederickChristTrump 2,011
4.) Tamamo 1,865
5.) Emmett Brown 1,759
6.) Deathpoint 1,502
7.) An Animated Factory 1,466
8.) Aaida 1,425
9.) a Clown 1,421
10.) Silverback 1,278
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Top Repairmen (Career)
Character
Items Repaired
1.) a black-footed ferret 8,712
2.) The Collector 4,598
3.) Father Christmas 2,820
4.) a tiny grasshopper 2,753
5.) An Animated Factory 2,685
6.) Jabril 2,586
7.) buzz deathwish 2,574
8.) GreatCatatonic 2,555
9.) Atka 2,184
10.) Mosqu 2,093
Top Killers (Career)
Character
Kills
1.) Two-Socks 4,256
2.) Baalberith 4,126
3.) Vile Brimstone 4,105
4.) Eliise 3,537
5.) Quarrel 3,066
6.) Kiano 2,691
7.) Liemannen 2,652
8.) Sartan 2,582
9.) Helen Keller 2,576
10.) A shadow 2,574
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Top Lockpickers (Breath)
Character
Locks Picked
1.) Set o Lockpicks 1,120
2.) Bob Ross 1,009
3.) Mika 1,006
4.) a wandering kitsune 1,005
5.) Hail Hydra!!1! 1,004
6.) Alwareus 1,003
7.) Ebola-chan 1,003
8.) Vriska Serket 1,002
9.) Glaceon 1,002
10.) invisime 1,001
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Top Lockpickers (Career)
Character
Locks Picked
1.) Set o Lockpicks 2,831
2.) Mr Dalliard 1,018
3.) Mika 1,012
4.) Good Guy Badziew 1,010
5.) Bob Ross 1,009
6.) Abijah the Twice-named 1,006
7.) Hail Hydra!!1! 1,005
8.) a wandering kitsune 1,005
9.) Killer Bean 1,003
10.) Alwareus 1,003
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Top Pet Killers (Breath)
Character
Pets Killed
1.) Nightwielder 1,405
2.) Mango 1,376
3.) Edgar Flume 1,268
4.) Finn 1,239
5.) Išunn 1,150
6.) a wandering kitsune 1,118
7.) Ariel Darkheart 1,106
8.) Katerina Hasheen 1,095
9.) Glaceon 1,055
10.) Doc Heywood 1,044
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Top Pet Killers (Career)
Character
Pets Killed
1.) Isabel Hasheen 2,595
2.) Liemannen 1,872
3.) Bob Ross 1,818
4.) Baalberith 1,768
5.) The Tartan Terror 1,518
6.) Zarįdiėl 1,516
7.) Nightwielder 1,405
8.) A Majestic Ghast 1,389
9.) Catvom 1,379
10.) Mango 1,376
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Top Pill Takers (Breath)
Character
Pills Taken
1.) IvankaTrump 1,649
2.) BarronTrump 1,593
3.) Sylveon 1,480
4.) a wandering kitsune 1,459
5.) Vriska Serket 1,458
6.) a small cloaked girl 1,420
7.) Charlie Day 1,395
8.) Zywie 1,335
9.) Ariel Darkheart 1,334
10.) Monognathus 1,266
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Top Pill Takers (Career)
Character
Pills Taken
1.) The Flash 1,754
2.) IvankaTrump 1,649
3.) BarronTrump 1,593
4.) Manrias le Normro 1,589
5.) Arnold 1,512
6.) Sylveon 1,480
7.) a wandering kitsune 1,459
8.) Liemannen 1,458
9.) Vriska Serket 1,458
10.) a small cloaked girl 1,420
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Top Degenerates (Breath)
Character
Power Removed
1.) Raziel 1,888
2.) Ed Gruberman 1,428
3.) a crossdressing cannibal 1,329
4.) Emma Burke 1,168
5.) Drell 1,150
6.) Volstok 1,081
7.) BarronTrump 1,079
8.) a wandering kitsune 1,070
9.) EricTrump 1,055
10.) MelaniaTrump 1,050
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Top Degenerates (Career)
Character
Power Removed
1.) Ohm von Blackvolt- Hertz 7,847
2.) Kenny McCormick 3,668
3.) Karst 2,652
4.) Circle 2,399
5.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,998
6.) Raziel 1,895
7.) Bad Horse 1,554
8.) Chrigel Glanzmann 1,457
9.) Ed Gruberman 1,428
10.) Justas 1,329
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Top Electricians (Breath)
Character
Power Restored
1.) Volstok 1,717
2.) Bob Ross 1,125
3.) Vylekh 1,100
4.) a wandering kitsune 1,084
5.) a tree octopus 1,076
6.) Indistinct Gibberish 1,067
7.) Grigori Rasputin 1,061
8.) tastyintestines 1,046
9.) Samizdat 1,025
10.) Marlowe Henderson 1,024
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Top Electricians (Career)
Character
Power Restored
1.) Jųstein Bever 3,633
2.) Gromit 2,204
3.) Guttersnipe 1,969
4.) a tree octopus 1,916
5.) Assistant Professor Chaos 1,805
6.) Volstok 1,717
7.) Rawson 1,711
8.) Janni 1,708
9.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,697
10.) Yeldarb 1,683
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Top Target Shooters (Breath)
Character
Targets Shot
1.) Rust Belt Bill 1,470
2.) Mrs Robinson 1,127
3.) AmIaGhost 1,029
4.) Rylai 1,025
5.) IvankaTrump 1,022
6.) 1-800 SPELLGEMS 1,020
7.) Wizard Of Da Hood 1,015
8.) The Majestic Deadmeat 1,010
9.) Shadowbane 1,009
10.) invisime 1,008
Quote:
Top Target Shooters (Career)
Character
Targets Shot
1.) buzz deathwish 2,209
2.) a tiny grasshopper 2,139
3.) Badziew 1,578
4.) Mika 1,549
5.) Pzkpfw. VIB Tiger II 1,534
6.) the return 1,524
7.) Rust Belt Bill 1,513
8.) The Green Arrow 1,464
9.) Mystic 1,343
10.) Good Guy Badziew 1,295
Top Readers (Breath)
Character
Books Read
1.) Slimer 2,525
2.) Molovian 2,294
3.) Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler 2,287
4.) Samantha Baron 2,187
5.) a red-billed cuckoo 2,136
6.) Abdul Alhazred 2,128
7.) Theta 1,965
8.) Elisabeth Kirchner 1,955
9.) Ranath Myket 1,860
10.) Cerce 1,795
Quote:
Top Lockpickers (Career)
Character
Locks Picked
1.) Set o Lockpicks 2,831
2.) Mr Dalliard 1,018
3.) Mika 1,012
4.) Good Guy Badziew 1,010
5.) Bob Ross 1,009
6.) Abijah the Twice-named 1,006
7.) Hail Hydra!!1! 1,005
8.) a wandering kitsune 1,005
9.) Killer Bean 1,003
10.) Alwareus 1,003
Joined: Jan 19, 2010 Posts: 239 Location: USA - CST
Posted: Sun Feb 16, 2020 8:53 pm Post subject:
Today, the Office of City Administration issued an official death toll for the devastating earthquake that struck Laurentia last Friday. In a statement delivered this morning, City Administrator Jonathan Moreau expressed condolences for the fourteen men and women who lost their lives and the hundreds injured, and called for unity and courage as Laurentia moves forward from the most powerful earthquake to strike the city in over a century.
Experts credited the low number of fatalities to extraordinary planning and preparation on the part of emergency response personnel. Director of Public Safety Albert Kojima praised Laurentian medics, firefighters and everyday citizens today for their āextraordinary heroism in the face of disasterā during five days of search and rescue operations. In the six years since his 2012 appointment, Kojima has made coordination between city disaster relief services a high priority, placing an emphasis on shared standards and unified lines of communication.
Advanced technology also played a role in the successes of emergency services this week. Spokesmen for the LCPD and the Fire Department credited the recent āSmart Cityā initiative ā also championed by Kojima ā for streamlining rescue operations by making unified road, utility and building information available at the fingertips of first responders. A definitive property damage toll of the recent earthquake has not yet been released, but insurers already estimate costs in the hundreds of millions.
Laurentia Uplift announced today that they would be opening a new research and development office in Silver City next year, following completion of the new office building that will stand to the southwest of the famed Olympic Tower. Laurentia Uplift, a relatively young company founded by famed billionaire and Sunset resident Raymond Cotterill, aims to link Laurentia to the increasingly lucrative space launch industry by constructing a small launch facility in the relatively unpopulated forests north of the Windfall Ridge and then pursuing more ambitious goals.
Cotterill, who also serves as CEO of Laurentia Uplift, has not shied away from making ambitious plans, often criticized as fantasy. He said in an interview with the Laurentia Sun last year that the Windfall Ridge launch facility would be the first step toward making Laurentia into an important transportation hub as nations increasingly seek to establish orbital presence, often in the form of unmanned satellites as well as luxurious orbital habitats. Cotterill has set a goal of constructing a tremendous space elevator off the coast of Laurentia within 40 years, something he believes will transform the identity of the city forever.
Laurentia Uplift has already provided technology for satellites and spacecraft launched by other countries through lucrative international contracts, often providing some of the cheapest routes to sending supplies and people into orbit. Cotterill, a well-known artist before becoming an entrepreneur, is famous for his detailed renderings of Laurentia as he expects it will appear in a century, often portraying futuristic buildings that dwarf even the Olympic Tower.
Newspaper wrote:
Top Angel Killers (Career)
Character
Angels Killed
1.) Quarrel 2,385
2.) Vile Brimstone 1,438
3.) A shadow 1,063
4.) Tufty, the psychotic squirrel 816
5.) Kiano 759
6.) Catvom 756
7.) Eliise 616
8.) Helen Keller 589
9.) Mr Scavvy 581
10.) Zenetar 550
The hottest summer in decades has not been a blow to business at the Inner Harbor Fishing Shop on the southern shore of Windfall Ridge. Jim Whittaker, owner of Inner Harbor Fishing, says that business as usual has mostly carried on, and that he has actually seen an uptick in visitors from warmer parts of the globe. "Ever since the airport was built, not long after I opened this place up, tourists from all over the globe have come by here to go fishing. The Ridge is a great place for it. A lot of our customers lately have been from warmer countries, so the heat is no problem for them. There are more of them than ever."
Whittaker is especially proud that Inner Harbor Fishing has been able to compete with the increasingly popular mountain hiking trails of Mt. Archimedes, Mt. Antharia, Mt. Olympus and Mt. Altrea. "Some people come down here, rent equipment, go fishing in the Inner Harbor or take a boat out to the ocean, then come back and go up the mountains to enjoy the views. Windfall Ridge has great variety, for sure. Diverse scenery and diverse people, from all over!"
Experts from Cimmerian University have said that the unseasonably hot summer is most likely just a blip, and that normal climate patterns should be expected next year, but they have cautioned people to be wary of the effects of extreme heat. No deaths or serious illnesses have been reported as yet this summer, according to the Health Department of Laurentia. Whittaker noted before a flurry of customers ended our interview that the hiking trails of Windfall Ridge have been fairly empty this season.
Newspaper wrote:
Top Readers (Career)
Character
Books Read
1.) Cassandra 3,893
2.) Bad Guy Badziew 3,363
3.) SonginSilence 3,297
4.) Gimner 3,199
5.) Muppetlord 3,153
6.) Good Guy Badziew 3,023
7.) a red-billed cuckoo 2,887
8.) Scarbrand 2,886
9.) Amtherion 2,883
10.) sheldonbunny 2,780
A recent citywide poll found that Laurentians favoured neutrality in the ongoing world war by a massive 87% margin. Conducted by the Laurentian Observer, the poll asked residents in each district of the city whether they were in favour of continued neutrality or if they felt Laurentia should begin offering support to one or more belligerents. The vast majority of respondents said that under no circumstances should the Free City side with any of the warring alliances.
The tiny minority that did favour Laurentian involvement in the war almost unanimously favoured Laurentian aid to its only neighbour and former mother country, the Hamartican Commonwealth. Hamartica only entered the war two weeks ago, leading to the closure of Laurentian land, air and sea borders. A few respondents explained that though Laurentia and the Commonwealth had different governments and national ideologies, they shared a common heritage and history.
A handful of respondents suggested that Laurentia should take advantage of the situation and join the war against Hamartica, seizing territory and expanding the nation even further beyond the borders of the existing Free City. The Hamartican military has been spread thin since joining the international peacekeeping mission nine years ago, just before the collapse of the Global Federation government. This has been cited by many experts as one of the reasons Laurentian independence was not challenged by the Hamartican military outside of the realm of political debates.
Top Punching Bags (Career)
Character
Damage Taken
1.) Kenny McCormick 701,977
2.) a bag of XP 485,010
3.) Nathan Grantham 420,339
4.) An True 356,478
5.) Elska Skapraun 287,673
6.) Franknfurter 287,670
7.) Champion Sounds 256,238
8.) Grunk the Pale 236,511
9.) A Majestic Ghast 192,943
10.) Bob Probert 190,996
Today plans were announced to commemorate the 70th anniversary of the establishment of Cimmerian University. The famed university, established on land owned by the family of early Laurentian settler Lucien Moreau, has enjoyed great success in recent decades, quickly becoming one of the most prestigious research institutions in the world. Cimmerian University Chancellor E.K. Smith said that the university planned a celebration of "a long history of ingenuity, hard work and cooperation" that made the establishment of the university possible.
Chancellor Smith also announced that a monument to famed history professor Erica Tatham would be unveiled in Quadrant Park next year as part of the anniversary celebrations, and that the park would be rechristened as Tatham Park to celebrate her accomplishments. Erica Tatham, daughter of Laurentia Capitol architect Elisabeth Tatham, was the longest-serving professor in Cimmerian University history, as well as being one of its original professors at its establishment.
It is thought that these celebrations are being planned far in advance to avoid conflicting with preparations for the bicentennial of Laurentia itself in 14 years, much of which will focus on the oldest surviving building in the city, the farmhouse built in southern Cimmeria by Lucien Moreau. University officials have stated that they will ensure celebrations of Cimmerian University do not overlap with the greater bicentennial celebrations almost a decade later. A redesign of the University logo will be unveiled next year.
Newspaper wrote:
Most Killed Characters (Career)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Kenny McCormick 10,710
2.) Elska Skapraun 4,895
3.) a bag of XP 3,543
4.) Devlin Bower 2,621
5.) Bob Probert 2,339
6.) An True 2,327
7.) the Gulf Oil Spill 2,165
8.) Bugabear 2,060
9.) tastyintestines 1,917
10.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,787
Last night, LCPD officers were called to The Smelly Cat bar in the famous FoCo neighbourhood of east-central Laurentia after a brawl involving two dozen or so patrons broke out and spilled onto the streets outside shortly after 1 AM. Witnesses say that the brawl broke out as a result of an argument over a poetry reading in Juliettes Bakery earlier in the evening. Two patrons were arguing over a historical metaphor used in a poem when friends of each became involved, and the dispute quickly escalated.
An employee of The Smelly Cat, who declined to give her name, said that they were fortunate that the fight spilled out onto the streets so quickly - as a result, damage to the bar itself was limited to a few broken glasses and a damaged table where the two arguing patrons were sitting. The employee said that both of the involved parties, along with most of the brawlers, were heavily intoxicated.
LCPD officials say nearly all of the participants in the brawl, including the two unidentified men whose argument sparked the ensuing brawl, were detained. A few spent the rest of the night in the Wolverton Police Department jail. A few brawlers attempted to escape and hide in the dark Evening Muse nightclub, but bouncers there tossed them onto the street when they tried to enter. The Four Corners neighbourhood is primarily located in the district of Wolverton, though its buildings straddle the area where Wolverton, Silver City, Sunrise and Sunset meet.
Newspaper wrote:
Top Door Repairmen (Breath)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Amok 1,344
2.) :Ghost: 1,170
3.) EricTrump 1,166
4.) Emma Burke 1,109
5.) FrederickChristTrump 1,066
6.) Terraplane 1,052
7.) Mettaton 1,052
8.) IvankaTrump 1,048
9.) PresidentDonaldTrump 1,047
10.) Preacher 1,045
The Davidson Memorial Hospital, long the primary center of mental health services in eastern Laurentia, has officially closed for renovations until an anticipated reopening date in spring of 2025. Davidson Memorial staff and City Administration officials shuttered the facility in a ceremony today that acknowledged its historical role while unveiling architectural renderings of the 1982 facility as it will appear when it opens its doors next year.
The closure has not been without controversy since it was first announced in early 2023. While the medical community has praised the new role of Davidson Memorial as a global center of augmentation-based medicine, some community groups, most notably the Sunrise Movement for Progress, have raised concerns that the suspension of mental health services will create gaps in basic medical care for needy citizens in Sunrise and elsewhere.
The Office of City Administration has unveiled ambitious plans to offer community-based resources to replace the services once offered at Davidson Memorial as part of the planned Sunrise Revitalization Project (SRP). City Administration spokesman Aldric Langlais issued a statement today declaring that āLaurentia will follow through on its promises to expand services in the communityā upon the closure of the hospital.
Newspaper wrote:
Top Gourmands (Career)
Character
Food Eaten
1.) Franknfurter 2,427
2.) Gromit 2,096
3.) Patchy the Pirate 1,676
4.) Black Saphire 1,673
5.) The King In Yellow 1,570
6.) Seldara 1,498
7.) Carilgar 1,487
8.) Chompy 1,471
9.) Bleu Saphire 1,424
10.) Nightfire 1,422
A mob of protestors gathered around the Olympic Tower has stayed up all night calling for City Administrator Kojima to emerge and restore order to the city after the second day of city-wide unrest. The protestors, who are mainly concentrated on International Avenue in front of the main entrance of the skyscraper, have demanded answers for the inexplicable disappearance of Laurentian political leadership in the face of the recent escalation of the war.
One protestor, who refused to give his name, said that citizens from all corners of the city had lost faith in government promises to protect Laurentian neutrality, and that their supposed disappearance is proof of this. "I assume that the members of Parliament are all in their bunkers now, safe and cozy. Why would they go there unless they thought the bombs were going to start falling on us? We are a city without leadership now, and we need answers more than ever."
A special detachment of the Laurentia City Police Department has stood in front of the doors leading into the Olympic Tower all night and into the morning hours, but at press time no representative of the LCPD had offered a statement. The protestors have been vocal and agitated toward the officers at the Olympic Tower, but have largely been peaceful with no reports of property damage last night.
Newspaper wrote:
Top Healers (Career)
Character
HP Healed
1.) A friendly sorcerer 144,135
2.) R5-D4 78,385
3.) Special Agent: Kitty-Bat-Kat 74,210
4.) Big Boy Bob 69,755
5.) Janni 65,589
6.) Sofia Piscitelli 59,905
7.) Serena Hasheen 58,464
8.) Manco 56,866
9.) Doc Heywood 49,550
10.) MzKoRE 48,987
Top Crafters (Breath)
Character
Items Crafted
1.) a random janitor 2,891
2.) Aaida 2,546
3.) Emmett Brown 2,441
4.) Sara 2,376
5.) Tamamo 2,188
6.) Notorious RBG 1,920
7.) Vriska Serket 1,871
8.) Martha Stewart 1,795
9.) Explosivo 1,662
10.) Deathpoint 1,604
After months of speculation and reports of financial unrest, it was officially announced today that the Wolverton Wolverines would officially fold after this season and cease to exist. The Wolverines, which have been in operation for almost sixty years, increasingly had difficulties filling Robinson Park, and struggled to compete in the league. City officials say that with the demise of the Wolverines, Robinson Park will be vacant most of the time, although large concerts and other events will still occasionally be held there.
The Wolverines have not won the championship title in almost forty years, and in recent decades ceased to be the fixture of popular culture that they were for most of the latter half of the 20th century. Some former players have found success in public life since their playing days, but no Wolverine has truly achieved international stardom in some time now. Team officials have said that many factors ultimately led to the demise of the once-legendary Wolverines, but that they hoped the team would one day rise from the ashes and enjoy success again.
Despite their name, the Wolverton Wolverines have been based in Silver City for all but the first fifteen years of their history. Over the years, there were occasional attempts to rename the team, but popular opposition ensured these efforts ended in failure. Following the end of the league season, the remaining Wolverine players will be dispersed to other teams in the league by way of a dispersal draft. With two months of the season remaining, the Wolverines languish in second-to-last place. Team and league officials confirmed this morning that the Wolverines would be able to play their remaining fixtures.
Newspaper wrote:
Top Crafters (Career)
Character
Items Crafted
1.) a random janitor 2,891
2.) Sara 2,889
3.) Aaida 2,546
4.) Emmett Brown 2,472
5.) Tamamo 2,188
6.) Andrew 2,085
7.) Notorious RBG 1,920
8.) Vriska Serket 1,871
9.) Martha Stewart 1,795
10.) Gromit 1,671
A recent survey of citizens of Laurentia found that despite his recent tendencies toward deep secrecy and avoidance of the public eye, a large majority of Laurentians approve of City Administrator Albert Kojima as his administration of the city enters its sixth year. Since Laurentia declared its status as a free and independent city four years ago, the city has enjoyed a unique prosperity and peace despite the increasing economic turmoil and international conflicts that have swept the globe.
Approximately 76% of respondents polled by the Laurentia Sun said that they were pleased with Kojima as City Administrator, with many of those (approximately 54%) saying that they had greater faith in the City Administration than in both houses of Parliament. Several respondents even argued that the City Administration should have complete control of the city rather than sharing responsibilities with Parliament.
A decrease in crime in all city districts was cited as a major contributing factor in the success of Kojima as City Administrator. Additionally, many respondents expressed pride in how the city managed to successfully navigate the tricky waters of independence without suffering a major economic downturn. Many analysts predicted the city would initially suffer difficult times once it began to chart its own path, and many Laurentians now say that it was the leadership of Albert Kojima that proved these analysts wrong.
Top Lockpickers (Career)
Character
Locks Picked
1.) Set o Lockpicks 2,831
2.) Mr Dalliard 1,018
3.) Good Guy Badziew 1,010
4.) Bob Ross 1,009
5.) Abijah the Twice-named 1,006
6.) Hail Hydra!!1! 1,005
7.) a wandering kitsune 1,005
8.) Killer Bean 1,003
9.) Alwareus 1,003
10.) Hohiro Kurita 1,003
The Sunrise Revitalization Project (SRP) will be indefinitely suspended due to the globe-spanning war, City Administration officials announced yesterday afternoon. The SRP, which had intended to eliminate poverty in Laurentia within 15 years, was suspended due to the expected economic downturn following the recent closure of Sidney International Airport and the Port of Laurentia. City Administration spokesman Aldric Langlais had the following to say:
"Without the boon of international trade, we must be careful about how we spend what money remains in our coffers. We must also be aware of our responsibilities to maintain public order and safety. The city and Parliament are completely aware of the importance of the SRP to our citizens in all districts of the city, and we fully intend to return to work on the project when this tumultuous time has passed."
A handful of politicians from the Justice Party protested the decision, with one suggesting that members of the Right Coalition had been looking for an excuse to suspend the project for sometime, and only found a convenient excuse with the outbreak of world war. Famed lawyer Michael R. Jones, leader of the Sunrise Movement For Progress, said that he was "deeply disappointed" by the decision and would hold the city to keeping its past promises. He also noted the strong public support for the SRP and said that he expected Laurentians from all corners of the city would be "mighty angry" if the SRP was not immediately resumed following the end of the war.
Newspaper wrote:
Top Pet Killers (Career)
Character
Pets Killed
1.) Isabel Hasheen 2,690
2.) Liemannen 1,896
3.) Bob Ross 1,833
4.) Baalberith 1,768
5.) The Tartan Terror 1,572
6.) Zarįdiėl 1,516
7.) Nightwielder 1,407
8.) A Majestic Ghast 1,392
9.) Catvom 1,379
10.) Mango 1,376
Laurentia city officials will hold a ceremony today commemorating the removal of the last section of light rail track in the city. Since the Ferry Rapid Transit System (FRTS) was introduced eight years ago, the mainland light rail system had been increasingly underused and had ceased to turn a profit within a year of the FRTS beginning operation. When the light rail system was shut down three years ago, the city embarked on an ambitious mission to remove all traces of its existence, starting with the district stations.
City Administrator Kojima said in a statement that he was proud of Laurentia for having reclaimed the land used by what he called a "now-obsolete" method of transportation. The FRTS, now powered by more than 80 automated ferries, increased inter-district travel by 13% in its first year. The light rail system had long been complained about by residents of Wolverton, who felt the light rail track cutting through the heart of the district was an "eyesore" and that the noise produced by the light rail cars was a frequent nuisance at night.
The 100% clean energy-driven ferry boats used by the FRTS have been praised for their safety and for providing a more luxurious travel experience than the cramped light rail cars. The advanced AI piloting technology has also been praised - in eight years of operation, no accidents have occurred. The FRTS was proposed, funded and implemented by the City Administration, with Parliament only passing resolutions praising it once it was completed and entered widespread use. Other world cities have sent experts to evaluate the FRTS, with some entertaining the possibility of purchasing ferry boats from Laurentia.
Newspaper wrote:
Top Pill Takers (Breath)
Character
Pills Taken
1.) IvankaTrump 1,649
2.) BarronTrump 1,593
3.) Sylveon 1,480
4.) a wandering kitsune 1,459
5.) Vriska Serket 1,458
6.) a small cloaked girl 1,420
7.) Charlie Day 1,395
8.) Zywie 1,335
9.) Ariel Darkheart 1,334
10.) Monognathus 1,266
_________________ "Hey, don't talk about bacon." - Frank Lapidus
plscks-20 | Davington-25 | James Ford-26 | Wiggles-1297 | Desmond-1298 | Richard Feynman-2769 | a random janitor-2772 | Kaz-12345 | Advocado-12867
Most Killed Characters (Career)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Kenny McCormick 10,710
2.) Elska Skapraun 4,896
3.) a bag of XP 3,556
4.) Devlin Bower 2,622
5.) Bob Probert 2,339
6.) An True 2,328
7.) the Gulf Oil Spill 2,165
8.) Bugabear 2,060
9.) tastyintestines 1,917
10.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,787
I have to say, the guy who played Kenny, as far as I'm aware hasn't been one for a couple of years and still be that far ahead on the whole death thing is pretty amazing. Dedication.
Joined: May 12, 2019 Posts: 22 Location: glueman's glue abode
Posted: Tue Mar 03, 2020 12:45 am Post subject:
Quote:
Top Electricians (Breath)
Character
Power Restored
1.) Volstok 1,717
2.) Bob Ross 1,125
3.) Coron 1,105
4.) Vylekh 1,100
5.) a tree octopus 1,084
6.) a wandering kitsune 1,084
7.) Indistinct Gibberish 1,067
8.) Grigori Rasputin 1,063
9.) tastyintestines 1,046
10.) Nightwielder 1,029
_________________ Active Chars // Glueman - 11968 // Dr Coomer - 12377 // Rootin Tootin Rasputin - 12819
Speaking as an occasional hunter of winged rats, in my experience the challenges are the nature of angels and of Elysium itself. For the first I have noticed through 3.5 Breaths that Angels (with notable exceptions/grinders like Bob Ross?) tend to huddle in SH if they are played at all; this is understandable as the risk-reward opportunities do not favour Nexal soup kitchens. As for the second Elysium has no day-night-power functionality which makes hunting there much more challenging than e.g. hunting by night in Laurentia. Void Walkers are by Jorm-design intend to excel at hunting random victims and therefore would be expected to lead in these circumstances.
Speaking as a player of both sides of the demon-angel divide, in my experience it is easier to hunt demons than it is to hunt angels. Players of demons tend to be less health-conscious; abilities such as Explosive Murder and Demon Tracker, and other demons, tend to reinforce the ephemeral nature of demonic life.
tl;dr? Angels = where's my pension plan, pipe and slippers? Demons = live fast, die young, leave an exploded corpse. _________________ Cheers,
Angels = where's my pension plan, pipe and slippers? Demons = live fast, die young, leave an exploded corpse.
If I had space on my signature line... this would have just been added. _________________ Carilgar (7989) | Seldara (7990) | Nightfire (7991) | Stormshadow (8049) | A Pair of Doorknocking Mormons (8050) | Chianni (8051) | Koldar (11873) | Themys (12088) | Selaedria (12395)
Joined: May 12, 2019 Posts: 22 Location: glueman's glue abode
Posted: Sun Apr 05, 2020 2:35 am Post subject:
Quote:
Top Punching Bags (Breath)
Character
Damage Taken
1.) a bag of XP 411,060
2.) Elska Skapraun 276,703
3.) Franknfurter 272,641
4.) An True 242,490
5.) Nathan Grantham 223,267
6.) BarronTrump 180,827
7.) I was once a plant! 160,921
8.) Sara 153,377
9.) Expired Condiments 124,368
10.) Gnarknorb 124,232
Quote:
Top Readers (Breath)
Character
Books Read
1.) Slimer 2,525
2.) Molovian 2,294
3.) Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler 2,287
4.) Samantha Baron 2,187
5.) a red-billed cuckoo 2,136
6.) Abdul Alhazred 2,128
7.) Theta 1,965
8.) Elisabeth Kirchner 1,955
9.) Ranath Myket 1,860
10.) Cerce 1,795
Quote:
Top Door Repairmen (Breath)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Amok 1,344
2.) :Ghost: 1,199
3.) EricTrump 1,166
4.) Emma Burke 1,109
5.) FrederickChristTrump 1,066
6.) Terraplane 1,052
7.) Mettaton 1,052
8.) Coron 1,049
9.) IvankaTrump 1,048
10.) PresidentDonaldTrump 1,047
Top Electricians (Breath)
Character
Power Restored
1.) Volstok 1,717
2.) Bob Ross 1,125
3.) Coron 1,105
4.) Vylekh 1,100
5.) a tree octopus 1,093
6.) a wandering kitsune 1,084
7.) Indistinct Gibberish 1,067
8.) Grigori Rasputin 1,065
9.) tastyintestines 1,047
10.) Nightwielder 1,032
Quote:
Top Door Destroyers (Breath)
Character
Doors Destroyed
1.) Devlin Bower 1,430
2.) Liemannen 1,356
3.) The Central Scrutinizer 1,191
4.) :Ghost: 1,160
5.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,154
6.) MelaniaTrump 1,088
7.) Armaros 1,079
8.) The Tartan Terror 1,072
9.) Pascal 1,066
10.) Huntress 1,063
Quote:
Top Repairmen (Breath)
Character
Items Repaired
1.) a black-footed ferret 3,101
2.) The Collector 2,988
3.) Tamamo 2,051
4.) FrederickChristTrump 2,011
5.) Emmett Brown 1,980
6.) Deathpoint 1,565
7.) Father Christmas 1,522
8.) Aaida 1,508
9.) An Animated Factory 1,466
10.) a Clown 1,440
Quote:
Top Gourmands (Breath)
Character
Food Eaten
1.) Franknfurter 2,426
2.) Patchy the Pirate 1,676
3.) Black Saphire 1,614
4.) Koldar 1,204
5.) Carilgar 1,180
6.) Flowey 1,175
7.) Seldara 1,171
8.) A Little Baby Dragon 1,150
9.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,139
10.) AmIaGhost 1,126
Quote:
Top Pet Killers (Breath)
Character
Pets Killed
1.) Nightwielder 1,546
2.) Edgar Flume 1,543
3.) Mango 1,391
4.) Finn 1,260
5.) Išunn 1,176
6.) Obliteration 1,135
7.) a wandering kitsune 1,127
8.) Ariel Darkheart 1,124
9.) Glaeken 1,098
10.) Katerina Hasheen 1,096
Quote:
Top Alcoholics (Breath)
Character
Booze Consumed
1.) Patchy the Pirate 4,696
2.) Rick C-137 1,523
3.) Rust Belt Bill 1,221
4.) FrederickChristTrump 1,127
5.) Tom Green 1,108
6.) A Little Baby Dragon 1,102
7.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,087
8.) an inconspicuous bystander 1,084
9.) A critical mass of fat guys 1,070
10.) MelaniaTrump 1,066
Quote:
Top Repairmen (Career)
Character
Items Repaired
1.) a black-footed ferret 8,796
2.) The Collector 4,598
3.) Father Christmas 3,231
4.) a tiny grasshopper 2,753
5.) An Animated Factory 2,685
6.) Jabril 2,586
7.) buzz deathwish 2,574
8.) GreatCatatonic 2,555
9.) Atka 2,184
10.) Emmett Brown 2,174
Quote:
Top Crafters (Career)
Character
Items Crafted
1.) Sara 3,225
2.) a random janitor 3,169
3.) Emmett Brown 2,906
4.) Aaida 2,626
5.) Notorious RBG 2,356
6.) Tamamo 2,338
7.) Andrew 2,085
8.) Vriska Serket 1,889
9.) Explosivo 1,884
10.) Martha Stewart 1,861
Quote:
Top Target Shooters (Career)
Character
Targets Shot
1.) buzz deathwish 2,209
2.) a tiny grasshopper 2,139
3.) Badziew 1,594
4.) Rust Belt Bill 1,555
5.) Pzkpfw. VIB Tiger II 1,534
6.) the return 1,526
7.) The Green Arrow 1,464
8.) Good Guy Badziew 1,422
9.) Mystic 1,343
10.) Peregrine Moore 1,251
Quote:
Top Door Repairmen (Career)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Gromit 1,858
2.) Guttersnipe 1,753
3.) Doorman! 1,694
4.) Black Saphire 1,511
5.) Tyrannicus 1,395
6.) Meatbag the Mime 1,388
7.) Amok 1,368
8.) Jabril 1,348
9.) The Majestic Deadmeat 1,338
10.) Tsutomu 1,320
Quote:
Top Killers (Career)
Character
Kills
1.) Two-Socks 4,256
2.) Baalberith 4,126
3.) Vile Brimstone 4,105
4.) Eliise 3,537
5.) Quarrel 3,103
6.) Liemannen 2,745
7.) Kiano 2,694
8.) Sartan 2,582
9.) Helen Keller 2,576
10.) A shadow 2,574
Quote:
Most Killed Characters (Career)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Kenny McCormick 10,710
2.) Elska Skapraun 4,912
3.) a bag of XP 3,731
4.) Devlin Bower 2,631
5.) An True 2,366
6.) Bob Probert 2,341
7.) the Gulf Oil Spill 2,165
8.) Bugabear 2,062
9.) tastyintestines 1,919
10.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,787
Quote:
Top Pet Killers (Career)
Character
Pets Killed
1.) Isabel Hasheen 2,833
2.) Liemannen 1,936
3.) Bob Ross 1,833
4.) Baalberith 1,768
5.) The Tartan Terror 1,760
6.) Edgar Flume 1,615
7.) Nightwielder 1,546
8.) Zarįdiėl 1,516
9.) A Majestic Ghast 1,405
10.) Mango 1,391
Quote:
Top Gourmands (Career)
Character
Food Eaten
1.) Franknfurter 2,437
2.) Gromit 2,096
3.) Patchy the Pirate 1,676
4.) Black Saphire 1,673
5.) The King In Yellow 1,570
6.) Seldara 1,499
7.) Carilgar 1,487
8.) Chompy 1,471
9.) Nightfire 1,429
10.) Bleu Saphire 1,424
_________________ Active Chars // Glueman - 11968 // Dr Coomer - 12377 // Rootin Tootin Rasputin - 12819
Top Door Destroyers (Breath)
Character
Doors Destroyed
1.) Devlin Bower 1,430
2.) Liemannen 1,357
3.) The Central Scrutinizer 1,192
4.) :Ghost: 1,175
5.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,154
6.) The Tartan Terror 1,119
7.) MelaniaTrump 1,088
8.) Armaros 1,079
9.) Pascal 1,066
10.) Huntress 1,065
Quote:
Top Door Repairmen (Career)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Gromit 1,858
2.) Guttersnipe 1,753
3.) Doorman! 1,694
4.) Black Saphire 1,511
5.) Tyrannicus 1,395
6.) Meatbag the Mime 1,388
7.) Amok 1,368
8.) Jabril 1,348
9.) The Majestic Deadmeat 1,338
10.) Tsutomu 1,320
Quote:
Top Readers (Career)
Character
Books Read
1.) Bad Guy Badziew 4,003
2.) Cassandra 3,893
3.) Good Guy Badziew 3,594
4.) SonginSilence 3,297
5.) Gimner 3,199
6.) Muppetlord 3,153
7.) Sentient Spellbook 3,115
8.) a red-billed cuckoo 2,887
9.) Scarbrand 2,886
10.) Amtherion 2,883
Quote:
Top Punching Bags (Breath)
Character
Damage Taken
1.) a bag of XP 428,673
2.) Franknfurter 282,846
3.) Elska Skapraun 276,728
4.) An True 250,080
5.) Nathan Grantham 225,437
6.) BarronTrump 180,827
7.) Sara 170,790
8.) I was once a plant! 163,078
9.) Gnarknorb 124,419
10.) Expired Condiments 124,368
Quote:
Top Pet Killers (Breath)
Character
Pets Killed
1.) Nightwielder 1,874
2.) Edgar Flume 1,545
3.) Išunn 1,518
4.) Mango 1,393
5.) Finn 1,261
6.) Obliteration 1,226
7.) Katerina Hasheen 1,149
8.) The Tartan Terror 1,144
9.) Pixel 1,144
10.) a wandering kitsune 1,128
Quote:
Top Healers (Breath)
Character
HP Healed
1.) Sofia Piscitelli 80,547
2.) Special Agent: Kitty-Bat-Kat 73,518
3.) Manco 73,042
4.) R5-D4 66,531
5.) Serena Hasheen 59,789
6.) Doc Heywood 52,960
7.) Dr Teeth 45,684
8.) Zywie 42,415
9.) Big Boy Bob 40,619
10.) no one 36,121
Quote:
Top Electricians (Career)
Character
Power Restored
1.) Jųstein Bever 3,633
2.) Gromit 2,204
3.) Guttersnipe 1,969
4.) a tree octopus 1,939
5.) Assistant Professor Chaos 1,805
6.) Janni 1,717
7.) Volstok 1,717
8.) Rawson 1,713
9.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,697
10.) Yeldarb 1,683
Top Lockpickers (Breath)
Character
Locks Picked
1.) Set o Lockpicks 1,777
2.) Glueman 1,128
3.) Bob Ross 1,009
4.) a wandering kitsune 1,005
5.) Hail Hydra!!1! 1,004
6.) Alwareus 1,003
7.) Ebola-chan 1,003
8.) Vriska Serket 1,002
9.) Glaceon 1,002
10.) invisime 1,001
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Lockpickers (Career)
Character
Locks Picked
1.) Set o Lockpicks 3,488
2.) Glueman 1,136
3.) Mr Dalliard 1,018
4.) Good Guy Badziew 1,010
5.) Bob Ross 1,009
6.) Abijah the Twice-named 1,008
7.) Hail Hydra!!1! 1,005
8.) a wandering kitsune 1,005
9.) Killer Bean 1,003
10.) Alwareus 1,003
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Healers (Breath)
Character
HP Healed
1.) Sofia Piscitelli 80,938
2.) Special Agent: Kitty-Bat-Kat 73,518
3.) Manco 73,402
4.) R5-D4 66,532
5.) Serena Hasheen 59,789
6.) Doc Heywood 52,960
7.) Dr Teeth 45,684
8.) Zywie 42,415
9.) Big Boy Bob 40,619
10.) no one 36,129
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Healers (Career)
Character
HP Healed
1.) A friendly sorcerer 144,135
2.) R5-D4 84,299
3.) Sofia Piscitelli 80,972
4.) Special Agent: Kitty-Bat-Kat 74,210
5.) Manco 73,431
6.) Big Boy Bob 72,472
7.) Janni 66,148
8.) Serena Hasheen 61,115
9.) Doc Heywood 52,960
10.) Dr Teeth 50,344
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Electricians (Breath)
Character
Power Restored
1.) Volstok 1,717
2.) Bob Ross 1,125
3.) Coron 1,105
4.) Vylekh 1,100
5.) a tree octopus 1,099
6.) a wandering kitsune 1,084
7.) Nightwielder 1,072
8.) Indistinct Gibberish 1,067
9.) Grigori Rasputin 1,066
10.) tastyintestines 1,047
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Electricians (Career)
Character
Power Restored
1.) Jųstein Bever 3,633
2.) Gromit 2,204
3.) Guttersnipe 1,969
4.) a tree octopus 1,939
5.) Assistant Professor Chaos 1,805
6.) Janni 1,717
7.) Volstok 1,717
8.) Rawson 1,713
9.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,697
10.) Yeldarb 1,683
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Degenerates (Breath)
Character
Power Removed
1.) Raziel 1,888
2.) Ed Gruberman 1,428
3.) a crossdressing cannibal 1,330
4.) Bad Horse 1,173
5.) Emma Burke 1,168
6.) Volstok 1,081
7.) BarronTrump 1,079
8.) a wandering kitsune 1,070
9.) a faceless child 1,067
10.) EricTrump 1,055
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Door Repairmen (Breath)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Amok 1,344
2.) :Ghost: 1,213
3.) EricTrump 1,166
4.) Emma Burke 1,109
5.) FrederickChristTrump 1,066
6.) Coron 1,054
7.) Terraplane 1,052
8.) Mettaton 1,052
9.) IvankaTrump 1,048
10.) PresidentDonaldTrump 1,047
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Door Repairmen (Career)
Character
Doors Repaired
1.) Gromit 1,858
2.) Guttersnipe 1,753
3.) Doorman! 1,694
4.) Black Saphire 1,511
5.) Tyrannicus 1,395
6.) Meatbag the Mime 1,388
7.) Amok 1,368
8.) Jabril 1,348
9.) The Majestic Deadmeat 1,338
10.) Tsutomu 1,320
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Door Destroyers (Breath)
Character
Doors Destroyed
1.) Devlin Bower 1,430
2.) Liemannen 1,357
3.) The Central Scrutinizer 1,192
4.) :Ghost: 1,175
5.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,154
6.) The Tartan Terror 1,119
7.) MelaniaTrump 1,088
8.) Armaros 1,079
9.) Pascal 1,066
10.) Huntress 1,065
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Door Destroyers (Career)
Character
Doors Destroyed
1.) Yarish 1,989
2.) Killer Bean 1,722
3.) Liemannen 1,628
4.) Black Saphire 1,596
5.) Devlin Bower 1,497
6.) Tyrannicus 1,481
7.) The Tartan Terror 1,245
8.) Mr Dalliard 1,245
9.) Baalhrezem 1,211
10.) Good Guy Badziew 1,211
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Repairmen (Breath)
Character
Items Repaired
1.) a black-footed ferret 3,210
2.) The Collector 2,988
3.) Tamamo 2,058
4.) Emmett Brown 2,013
5.) FrederickChristTrump 2,011
6.) A pair of doorknocking Mormons 1,713
7.) Father Christmas 1,656
8.) Deathpoint 1,582
9.) Aaida 1,518
10.) An Animated Factory 1,466
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Repairmen (Career)
Character
Items Repaired
1.) a black-footed ferret 8,905
2.) The Collector 4,598
3.) Father Christmas 3,365
4.) a tiny grasshopper 2,753
5.) An Animated Factory 2,685
6.) Jabril 2,586
7.) buzz deathwish 2,574
8.) GreatCatatonic 2,555
9.) Emmett Brown 2,207
10.) You Stay Classy Nexus 2,184
Top Angel Killers (Career)
Character
Angels Killed
1.) Quarrel 2,417
2.) Vile Brimstone 1,438
3.) A shadow 1,063
4.) Catvom 859
5.) Tufty, the psychotic squirrel 816
6.) Kiano 768
7.) Eliise 616
8.) Helen Keller 589
9.) Mr Scavvy 581
10.) Zenetar 550
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Alcoholics (Breath)
Character
Booze Consumed
1.) Patchy the Pirate 4,696
2.) Rick C-137 1,523
3.) Rust Belt Bill 1,223
4.) FrederickChristTrump 1,127
5.) Tom Green 1,108
6.) A Little Baby Dragon 1,104
7.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,087
8.) an inconspicuous bystander 1,084
9.) A critical mass of fat guys 1,072
10.) MelaniaTrump 1,066
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Alcoholics (Career)
Character
Booze Consumed
1.) Patchy the Pirate 4,696
2.) Grugg 4,497
3.) tastyintestines 2,928
4.) Yaz Shamriz 2,052
5.) Vile Brimstone 2,042
6.) Rust Belt Bill 1,744
7.) Overseer 1,681
8.) Sac II 1,673
9.) Gromit 1,642
10.) Rick C-137 1,523
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Gourmands (Breath)
Character
Food Eaten
1.) Franknfurter 2,433
2.) Patchy the Pirate 1,676
3.) Black Saphire 1,614
4.) Koldar 1,205
5.) Carilgar 1,181
6.) Flowey 1,175
7.) Seldara 1,171
8.) A Little Baby Dragon 1,151
9.) Hyperbolic Stan 1,139
10.) AmIaGhost 1,126
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Gourmands (Career)
Character
Food Eaten
1.) Franknfurter 2,444
2.) Gromit 2,096
3.) Patchy the Pirate 1,676
4.) Black Saphire 1,673
5.) The King In Yellow 1,570
6.) Seldara 1,499
7.) Carilgar 1,488
8.) Chompy 1,471
9.) Nightfire 1,429
10.) Bleu Saphire 1,424
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Pet Killers (Breath)
Character
Pets Killed
1.) Nightwielder 1,874
2.) Edgar Flume 1,545
3.) Išunn 1,518
4.) Mango 1,393
5.) Finn 1,270
6.) Obliteration 1,227
7.) Katerina Hasheen 1,149
8.) The Tartan Terror 1,144
9.) Pixel 1,144
10.) a wandering kitsune 1,128
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Pet Killers (Career)
Character
Pets Killed
1.) Isabel Hasheen 2,948
2.) Liemannen 1,984
3.) Nightwielder 1,874
4.) The Tartan Terror 1,871
5.) Bob Ross 1,833
6.) Baalberith 1,768
7.) Edgar Flume 1,617
8.) Išunn 1,518
9.) Zarįdiėl 1,516
10.) A Majestic Ghast 1,408
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Punching Bags (Breath)
Character
Damage Taken
1.) a bag of XP 429,565
2.) Franknfurter 283,158
3.) Elska Skapraun 276,728
4.) An True 250,361
5.) Nathan Grantham 225,485
6.) BarronTrump 180,827
7.) Sara 171,210
8.) I was once a plant! 163,180
9.) Gnarknorb 124,419
10.) Expired Condiments 124,368
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Punching Bags (Career)
Character
Damage Taken
1.) Kenny McCormick 701,977
2.) a bag of XP 532,213
3.) Nathan Grantham 428,017
4.) An True 373,320
5.) Franknfurter 312,966
6.) Elska Skapraun 289,613
7.) Champion Sounds 256,324
8.) Grunk the Pale 236,551
9.) A Majestic Ghast 199,893
10.) Haldos Jnr 193,077
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Readers (Career)
Character
Books Read
1.) Bad Guy Badziew 4,004
2.) Cassandra 3,893
3.) Good Guy Badziew 3,603
4.) SonginSilence 3,297
5.) Gimner 3,199
6.) Muppetlord 3,153
7.) Sentient Spellbook 3,126
8.) a red-billed cuckoo 2,887
9.) Scarbrand 2,886
10.) Amtherion 2,883
The Newspaper wrote:
Most Killed Characters (Breath)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Elska Skapraun 4,749
2.) a bag of XP 2,951
3.) An True 1,900
4.) Grigori Rasputin 1,680
5.) Devlin Bower 1,236
6.) Ricky Spanish 1,128
7.) Aaaargh 1,094
8.) The Central Scrutinizer 1,068
9.) Mango 1,061
10.) a young Adolf Hitler 1,056
The Newspaper wrote:
Most Killed Characters (Career)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Kenny McCormick 10,710
2.) Elska Skapraun 4,912
3.) a bag of XP 3,852
4.) Devlin Bower 2,637
5.) An True 2,431
6.) Bob Probert 2,344
7.) the Gulf Oil Spill 2,165
8.) Bugabear 2,064
9.) tastyintestines 1,921
10.) Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg 1,787
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Target Shooters (Breath)
Character
Targets Shot
1.) Rust Belt Bill 1,515
2.) Mrs Robinson 1,127
3.) Aaida 1,063
4.) Zywie 1,062
5.) Scarah 1,039
6.) AmIaGhost 1,030
7.) Rylai 1,029
8.) IvankaTrump 1,022
9.) 1-800 SPELLGEMS 1,020
10.) Wizard Of Da Hood 1,015
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Target Shooters (Career)
Character
Targets Shot
1.) buzz deathwish 2,209
2.) a tiny grasshopper 2,139
3.) Badziew 1,616
4.) Rust Belt Bill 1,558
5.) Good Guy Badziew 1,544
6.) Zagara 1,534
7.) the return 1,526
8.) The Green Arrow 1,464
9.) Mystic 1,343
10.) Peregrine Moore 1,251
The Newspaper wrote:
Top Crafters (Career)
Character
Items Crafted
1.) Sara 3,465
2.) Emmett Brown 3,258
3.) a random janitor 3,169
4.) Aaida 2,700
5.) Notorious RBG 2,524
6.) Tamamo 2,338
7.) Andrew 2,085
8.) Explosivo 1,998
9.) Deathpoint 1,970
10.) Vriska Serket 1,895
Update time. I'm looking at you Tem Shop. Make my purchases extra worth it. _________________ Carilgar (7989) | Seldara (7990) | Nightfire (7991) | Stormshadow (8049) | A Pair of Doorknocking Mormons (8050) | Chianni (8051) | Koldar (11873) | Themys (12088) | Selaedria (12395)
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